Agent Shawnee

What is more important your ego or your relationships and friendships?

Let me tell you something wise I have learned from the stubborn egomaniacs of the world. If your ego comes first, in the end, all you will have left is that ego.

So what is so really great about your ego? Is it worth losing someone you care about?

If someone you claim to care about tells you how they feel about things you have done... how do you react?

Your reaction is EVERYTHING!!

So which path do you choose? Do you choose the higher road and say something simple like...
"I'm really sorry you feel that way. What did I do to make you feel that way? How can I make it better?"
Then you can hear them out and try to make a effort.

Crisis averted.

Now... if you don't take the higher road, you might just stomp out any future relationship with that person.

If you...

• Turn everything they say around on them.
  
• Sit there and point out every fault they have.
  
• Sit there and point out things that never happened.
  
• Make excuses.
  
• Accuse them of hurting you.
  
• Threaten to take away your friendship.
  
• Throw a pity party.
  
• Accuse them of having other problems.

...you will end up hurting the person even more.

Then how do you fix that? Do you dig a deeper hole? Do you just keep saying things that are worse and worse?

What good is all this? What can anyone get out of reacting like this?

Last night I tried to express the way I was feeling toward someone and their reaction was the later. The way I felt was never acknowledged. This person just decided to tell me everything that was wrong with me instead. Then they followed it by accusing me of never giving them a chance to communicate with me. How hard is to pick up the phone and say, "Hey I need to talk to you about this?" I'm not going to say "Ok it's time for you to tell me everything you feel like you need to communicate with me!" I can't be held responsible for someone not knowing how simple it is to reach out to someone. Then it turned into excuses such as "I have a stressful job." I have stress and problems too that doesn't make it ok to ignore someone.

At that point I had enough. There is no reason I should sit there and listen to that bullshit from anyone just because they didn't like how I was feeling towards them. So I told them they could have the whole project that was my idea in the first place (Which is not an easy thing to give up! That's just how irate I was at this person!) and went to bed.

I woke up to an email with a title...
You are throwing away a good thing

Really? Me? It takes two to tango and my feet kept getting stepped on so why should I stay on the dance floor?

The email contained a threat to end our friendship if I walked away from this project.

Would you stick around if you got that reaction because you told someone you felt left out of a project that was your idea in the first place?

I can't fix this. This person has dug themselves to deep of a hole and I am not going to pull them out of it. I now still feel the way I felt when I first tried to communicate the problem and extremely disappointed in the way they handled them selves. This makes me wonder how they will handle them selves if this project were to blow up and they have to deal with the public saying way worse things.

The more I think about this fucked up situation the more I wonder if seeing this person in person is a good idea. I might blow a fuse and give them a verbal lashing. No, I know I would if they said any of the things they said online to me in person. That's a side of me I do not like and I would hate to see it brought down upon someone.

I think I should just clear my mind of this problem and let this person figure out how to make it better.

"Darling I'll leave and you wont come along.
So give me the reason to stay.
Give me the reason to wait.

♥ Shawnee